Here you find frequently asked questions (FAQ) about corset wearing and tightlacing in the category “How to motivate a partner to start corseting?”.
I’m happy to receive many e-mails. But please, please, please, read these FAQ first and write only if questions aren’t answered there! Also don’t send tremendous long attachments unless requested; it takes too long to download them. Pictures must absolutely be sent as JPG or PNG files and not as BMP or TIF files.
On this page I have collected frequently asked questions and added my answers. As a consequence, the contents are subjective.
Motivating partners to start corseting and/or thightlacing
How can I get HER to like wearing corsets?
This is one of the most frequently asked questions. Since it plays a special role in the spreading of corsets all over the world, I shall deal with it in as much detail as possible; and I’ll describe everything from the point of view of a woman who laces herself.
The first thing you should do is to set yourself realistic objectives! Exaggerated expectations always end up in disappointment. It’s of utmost importance that you don’t push your partner or even exert mental pressure on her! In the beginning it’s best if you intimate vaguely that you like small waists and that HER waist is quite small by nature (if that’s true). Tell HER that tight-fitting clothes are fashionable nowadays. This may be the start for a discussion about how to emphasize the waist or how to set off HER figure to best advantage. At this point you could state that it is possible to stand out from the masses by enhancing the beauty of a special feature. Suggest that SHE could make HER waist even smaller than it is by nature. Maybe she then thinks of corsets - and refuses to wear any. Or you could mention that it’s not a new thing to make one’s waist smaller, as this was common during the Belle Epoque, for example. This is the point where most women reject the idea of a corset en bloc. If SHE doesn’t you’re lucky and one thing will lead to another.
But let’s fancy that she says the corset would oppress women and it would cause damage to the health etc.. These are typical prejudices among people who don’t know anything about corset-wearing. It’s very important to do away with these. At first you could tell HER that it has nothing to do with oppression, for SHE is supposed to wear corsets of her own free will and voluntarily. Women in earlier times had no choice, but today they have an option! Now it’s very important to make clear to HER what the advantages of a corset are. The texts of this website can help you with this. I recommend you to print out the corset adviser and to read it through together with HER or to let HER read it and talk about it afterwards. As an introduction for the text you should mention that it was written by me, a woman who laces herself. You could show HER photos (maybe some showing me) from the website. But in this context you should under no circumstances create a situation of competition, you should rather indicate realizable opportunities, i.e. by showing HER authentic photos. I’ll give you some examples to make myself clear: it wouldn’t help much if you said "…you are to be as small as the lady on the photo one day…". It sounds better to say "…look, how much more feminine she looks with a corset on …" or something like that. It’s absolutely necessary that you tell HER that corsets can (but need not necessarily) be worn every day (with almost every possible style of clothing), that they are not uncomfortable, harmful or inconvenient and that there are no handicaps from the corset if it’s used appropriately. It seems proper and useful to me to compare corsets to high-heeled shoes.
Ideally SHE would now like to try out corsets herself. And for you this means moderation. I mean moderation concerning your objectives and moderation concerning the period of time in which you’d like to realize your objectives. If HER first corset isn’t especially tight and if SHE can wear it and feels comfortable in it, it will be much easier for her to like it than if SHE felt not good while wearing it. In the above mentioned text I wrote that, after some time, it is easy to exchange the first corset for a smaller one. So you should get at first a corset that looks beautiful and that makes the waist smaller by approx. 5 cm. She should wear the corset only if she feels like it. Make compliments on HER figure and keep back your high expectations; and soon you can probably see that SHE likes wearing corsets. Do increase the tightness of HER waist in a way that SHE can tolerate and that SHE finds agreeable. This should be the only criterion determining HER waistline. I can serve as an example, for my waist is quite small and I find it agreeable; I feel good in my corset. But don’t forget that I got used to that tightness over a long period of time - my body yielded so that the corset is not actually very tight. If necessary, SHE can contact me by e-mail ( ). I wish you much success in your efforts to convince HER!
How can I arrange for HIM to like corsets on me (and to buy me some)?
- Tell HIM about your wish, and HE will run and buy as many corsets as you want, you will see.
- Borrow a corset, put it on and show the result to HIM. HE will be ready to buy as many corsets as you want!
- Net result: Men are having a hard time, while things are much easier for women :-)